Smashing the floor in Sasburg

Surviving the Sasburg 101 requires one to get out there, meet people and get some exercise in!
But there not being a mountain here and all to hike out (except for little "koppies" and mine heaps that resemble a Table Mountain or Lions' Head), it was needed to join the local Virgin Active in Vanderbijlpark at once. So for about four weeks now I have been smashing the floor, spinning like a beast, on my knees, legs in the air, and shaking that thing like an animal....and let me tell you it ain't easy.

At my gym there are a group of ladies in their golden years who take almost all the classes and man have they gots the moves. I cannot keep up with them and most of the other ladies (who are super fit)  can't either.  These ladies are legends - no animals! So I decided I am gonna stick with them, find out what classes they're taking and attend those.

Smashin' the floor in the 80's, looked so much hotter then

As the only class I attended initially was spinning with the Panda and boy does it hurt during and after a session. Let me just say you end up being seriously envious of the lady in front of you who has a gel seat, coz riding a bike even though stationary hurts them sweetmeats....it only gets better after the third ride. Very sensitive.
Our instructor doesn't have any mercy either, when she says: "Okay guys we gonna take it slow", it means we gonna listen to Neal Diamond and put that resistance up to 9 b!t@#es...that's what it means! Don't be fooled by Neil baby he's hardcore, he wants you to ride that steep hill and feel the burn.
We also have little spin offs against each other, we clap after our spin to spur on the other team when they spin. It's nice it helps you through the pain and in the end we're all hurting the same.
The best part is when our instructor says: "If your heart rate is not sky high now, then you're not in my class. Pick up the pace". Yes ma'am, higher resistance ma'am, faster ma'am, thank you ma'am.
During a hectic session she shouts: "Okay guys on lower resistance just spin it out, spin it out". I thought she was saying: "spit it out" coz by that time I'm like a broken wild horse ready to drop to my knees and just cry it out....but it is a really good class. I can see the results on my legs - getting more shape and its tighter muscles as oppose to flub, so thanks crazy instructor lady you can stay.

"Spin it out!". I am sweating, spitting and crying it out right now!

Zomg are we done yet? I'm just gonna stand here just for a bit. Just give me a second.

Taking it slow on some Neil Diamond for real

This is going to be me in a few weeks time, sipping on some water and spinning it out without even breaking a sweat.

So the golden ladies like shakin' that thing at sexy Zumba, and me too I must admit. I don't know how sexy I am as I am still figuring out all the moves as I go. Sometimes I lose all co-ordination when I have to use my arms and legs at the same time - It takes a bit longer for the white girl with a butt to get the moves right. But dang is it fun and you come out there sweating! I especially enjoy the Friday morning instructor who breaks it down herself and after our class she is dripping in sweat. Respect.
The only slightly awks thing is that the studio is next to where the roid rage junkies are pumping some serious iron. They end up standing right at the window and staaaarre like Jarred stalker starrre...
But not for long, see our instructor does this war chant scream and gets us all hyped up and we stomp our feet to the floor while screaming, red in the face and looking damn angry at the world right now. So when those roid ragers end up gawking at us...and we stare back at them while our instructor screams. I think it kinda looks like this for them:
Instructor: "How you feeling?"
Us: "Pumped"
Instructor: "Have you had enough yet?".
Us: "Hell No, bring it!"
Instructor: "Do you wanna beat up some iron pumping stalkers out there?"
Us: "Zumba, f@3k yeah!"
They immediately dissapear as soon as we give them the death stare...I think it is kinda scary, we stare them down and holding I contact.
So as you can imagine I am quite hyped up aggro when I get home to the panda that's why he's like: "Calm the Zumba f@#k down, there is no war out here"....it's fun. I can highly recommend it!

Sexy Zumba

In my mind that's what like to believe I look like while Zumba-ing my butt off

The other classes the golden ladies have introduced me to are Kick and Move.

For some high intensity action the Kick class is way up there. You just don't simply jump up and down and do a few air punches. No, we had a lady that was in Satan's sister mode who put us on a boot camp...for real. Shame, in all fairness the instructor was hectic but really good at what she does, she worked us big time. There were 4 workout stations on rotation. We did multiple lunges, squats, push ups, core exercises, rolled around like a monkey, crawled like a trooper, we skipped, we ran, we shoved our pelvics in the air...all for the love of exercise and wanting to be fit. I started laughing at one point when the exercises got too hectic because I didn't want to cry. It might have given the wrong impression like maybe I'm a crazy mofo who wants to be punished some more while all the people had pain stricken  expressions on their faces. If you dig Kick and Zumba then you will dig the Move class - it is like aerobics but to the max. You get a good workout. Both these are kickass classes. 

Aerobics to the max

I have decided that I need some balance in my life and stretching of the muscles in my routine, as I am doing a lot of cardio. So I am taking the Pilates class once a week. Don't be fooled by the instructor lady, she is neither young nor built like a race horse. I'm not sure if she is Russian or German, I cannot judge by her accent, but she gives you a thorough workout.  From stretching to strengthening your core muscles, it's sometimes a bit strenuous but I can feel my tummy muscles getting stronger and tighter, yayness. Thou the little push ups still kills me. You also have to balance on the roller while your legs are in air (it's complicated) and I still can't get my legs straight when lifting them up...

Pilates for balancing and stretching the muscles

After a session at the gym that's what I feel like (pic below). Only I am much more red faced and sweating like some unworldly beast that's busy dying while making huffing and puffing noises....not a pretty sight.

I really feel awesome, no really... just resting my eyes for a bit

By the way who nominated the schmuck in the pic below standing at the back there? I only discovered this now, why was I not informed on this? We could have nominated someone better to represent us. Really now, I mean really...

Seriously look at this sad picture

'Till next time keep smashing that floor!

Bouf
xx

Does it come in panda?

As promised I will share with you why I like pandas so much.
It all started one evening when googling images of cute little pandas to make me smile after a not so hot day at the office. It then became the pet name of my sweetheart. 'Till it eventually became an obsession...and on one occasion when visiting a local Chinese owned bargain store on a constrained budget near our work place, with my friend Shanaaz, it evolved into a saying. As we wandered through the store excitedly bargain after bargain, we needed to find a mechanism to control our shopping urge. There had to be some logic and restraint, as we were bound to walk out with bags of unneccessary goods, I started to ask: "But does it come in panda?" (because I am obsessed with pandas and need to have panda merchandise). If the answer was yes then I needed to have it at once (as Shanaaz would say)...It seemed to help us make the right buying decisions. We didn't find what we initially looked for but at least we ended up leaving with only a cell phone cover (I think), I might have bought some little note books with pandas on them. A note book always comes in handy....

The point is that I love pandas because they are just dang cute!

They are beautiful, majestic, unique, furry, playful, adventurous little creatures. Not the mention the most commercialized little animals that are the main feature on a series of business logo's and retail products.

Can you cope with the amount of cuteness below? I can't

"I didn't take the last cupcake it was the panda kitteh...really"

Hugging pandas

Panda in the mist

"Will you be my friend?" Yes I will!

They greet:

The below indeed comes in panda:

Panda locksmiths - for real

Panda shirt

Travel in panda style

Apparently there are panda cats out there...

"Meeoouw panda"

and little cra-cra pandas

Pandas always smash the floor gangnam style

Because they are fancy...

Pandas are laid back:

Dang they're cute! There there little one, there there.

"I'm sorry I ate the last cupcake"

So why do you like pandas?

Bouf

xx

Ridin' dirty - Free State style

They see me rollin' they hatin'.....gonna catch me riding dirty...ridin' dirty in the Burg. Very appropriate song playing in my head this morning as I drove through the dusty streets of Sasolburg today...

So I am ridin' dirty in my beloved "Blauw Besie" (my little blue devil car that has been so fondly christened by my sweetheart) through the mean streets of the Burg past remnants of dust, discarded papers, pamphlets, damaged property and trash all owing to the unhappy folks of Zamdela, who voiced their concerns on a matter regarding the merging with another municipality last week, by partaking in some violent protesting.

The Blauw Besie is ridin' dirty a lot these days as I stay in Vaal Park better known by the locals as "Vuil Park" due to the pollution in the air by steel, electricity and gas production (and a few other things we don't want to know about) in the area. Today is a sad and happy day as the Blauw Besie is no longer a Cape Tonian but a Freestater, better known as "VRRRRYYSTATER"! As I had to re-register my little car in the province today, so now I am totally legit and no longer a foreigner :)

Table Mountain  and ocean view (Cape Town)

Industrial bushveld view (Sasol Eco Park, Sasolburg)

The longest part of my journey was finding the ever illusive vehicle license department in a small town where there is basically one shopping centre in the CBD with pretty much all the major businesses. I must admit very conveniently located in a central area.

As surprised as you will be to find out that it was quite difficult finding this place and it required directions from various sources (as there is not a clear address available on the municipality's website for the vehicle license department). It seems that EVERYONE in Sasolburg uses the Standard Bank as a point of reference, according to the directions I received everything is within walking proximity from the Standard Bank. This is true but not in all cases, well, if you can find the Standard Bank in the first place which is inside the shopping centre. After today I am not very fond of the Standard Bank in the Burg. Oh and it is in the brown building situated on the 1st floor. Let's say I think I have become very familiar with all the brown buildings in the area and to note there isn't just one as was explained. Needless to say after much driving, uttering of profanities, impatience, sweating and directions from various sources I found the place. It is situated across from the Indaba Hotel above an ABSA (please note not the Standard Bank).

In short, the Blauw Besie and I had not really prepared ourselves for the quick and abrupt reality of having to change from a black and white Western Cape number plate to a green and yellow Free State one with a cheetah on it. It was understandable that we were both a bit deprezzles about it and I might have cried a bit walking back to the parking lot with my Free State number plates under my arm. The car guard was a bit concerned for my well being you know with the crying after visting the vehicle license department, but I had to man up I am Free Stater now!

It would be cuter though if they can put a little red panda on the number plate someday...even if it wouldn't make any sense. I just like pandas, which I will tell you all about next time... ZOMG it's a red little panda on my number plate!

 Cheetah on Free State number plate

Red little panda growling....so cute

Bouf
xx